Risk it, or risk nothing.

I had a chat with a friend recently. And this was what he typed.

XXX says:
i dunno la..
i dunno wad i wan from this life
its like.. i work previously, i m nt happy...
i work now, i m also not happy...
and i wanna do business... not sufficient fund
and the fear of risking everything...
because i haf too much to risk
so now i m stuck in the middle of no where. not knowing wad is best for me to do rite now

I thought to myself at that point:

He's 25. He just graduated few years ago. He has two jobs since, neither of which he's happy with. He seems to have a stable CV. Average income according to him.


What does he has to risk?

His job? He's not happy in it in the first place.

His income? Not that it's very satisfying at the moment.

Youth? COME ON, 25? As a man?

That's the thing. Many of us walk down this path, because we think that if we were to take the step we always dare to dream of taking, we will forever be dreaming of that what-if.

So money might be an issue. But money only provides stability, life is not about stability, life is risky, being alive is an adventure. Some of us have gone through so much shit in life that when we look back, life isn't life if it's as easy as waking up and falling asleep everyday.

Life is life, because it is uncertain, and we build our certainty on these uncertainties, but we don't stay there, we build more, and more, and so much more till we realise that, well... so this is life.

So what we screw up, hey you want to talk a path that's so straight and boring and wide? Take a hike! Up the mountain, down the muddy puddle, when you fall, there's always a big fat concrete road next to you where you can fall back on.

You experience is your concrete road, and getting back into the workforce is always the basic of all basics. Whenever you want to take a break, go for it. No one said there's an dateline to which you have to reach your goal.

Take your time, an easy stroll, a detour down the flower garden. Enjoy, relax, rejuvenate, then come back.

Life isn't about rationality, since when have you heard people loving rationally? Living a life is like falling in love. Be ready to get hurt, to fall, then to get back up and back in the game, it's that never-ending pursuit, till you find the one, the perfect one, or close to perfection. Why settle for someone you half love, when you know someone out there somehow sometime in the future will show up, whom will sweep you off your feet and blow you away.

You don't just sit there and think that you are satisfied just because you are afraid of getting hurt, that is not love! nor life! Do yourself a favour, do your heart (and your partner's) a favour, and get out there and trip!

I have been contemplating so much in my life what I should do or what I shouldn't do. And I know I worry too much, that everything will just turn out in the end the way they should always do. Why worry, when I can pursue, when I have the choice to pursue. How many out there are not blessed with a choice, what insane mind I have to even think I should be taking so many steps back when I have the choice to take a step forward.

The conversation strikes me. What have I got to lose?

Realistically, what in life that can be so tragically important or life-threatening that I cannot afford risking/losing?

Many elements in life are deem as a "risk" because we are so defined by society's stringent expectations. Achieve young, stable income, retire early, own properties, be insured, etc.

So yes there are always limitations, there's always financial security as one ages, commitment and responsibilities. But, at the same time, there is always a choice. And reasoning with yourself is the first thing that would stop you from taking every step ahead. Balance, priority, and choice.

Just ask yourself: "Why not...", "How I can...", "oh what the hell...".

Remember, it's always a choice.


16 kissed Nicole

  1. Maybe there r 2 types of people & some just can't change...? Sigh~ i'm glad I'm the 'Risker'!!!

  2. 90% of the people in this world is like that.

  3. Sink or Swim the choice is ours to make... So make the right choice.

  4. Can't agree more with this writing.

    I am glad that I am the riskier one :).

  5. Let's put this simply, most Malaysian youths are not adventurous. They don't take chance.

    Insufficient funds for business? Find! Loan! You need to earn it the hard way!

    I'm earned my life now in a very hard way.

  6. So true...but you have to dare to take that leap. Society and family's expectations don't always leave you free to pursue your dreams...

  7. That's admirable to risk...i've tried risking a few times but unfortunately didn't work out for me

  8. Vincent Kok19/4/09 6:08 PM

    Well.. it's better risking than regretting for not risking... it's always like that in the minds of people... if risk... scare this scare that.. No harm done though... Risk something you'll lose something in the process... but the experience is very good considered that you've learned something from it rather than nothing

  9. I totally agree with what you said here. Sometimes it's so painful to hear ppl complaining but not doing any effort to make a change.

  10. i guess alot of ppl r jz comfortable where they r, like, change is a thing dat they will try to avoid at all cost, becoz change makes things diff, ironic isnt it? sum ppl jz ct stand changes, they r so comfy wif how they lives r living dat they will not risk anything to undo wat they currently have, sumtimes im like this, i hate change, but sumtimes it's the change u need to move up in the world, im still fightin an inner battle wif myself, any suggestions nicole? :<

  11. i love this post of you!

    exactly, life should not just follow an equation! there's nothing like the right path for everyone's life. We have been taught to study as much as we can, and many of us don't really understand what's the purpose of it. I know of friends who take a break, work, or travel with own expenses, i.e. work while travelling, before getting back to uni; and they have real life experience, more mature in thinking and less likely to just fall apart when something unexpected happened. And they appreciate education more after that. Many of us are too afraid of taking risk, and the worst thing is, when the others are not following how they live their life, they just couldnt accept it.

    I think it's awesome to live life your very own way, just like yrself! Life is too short to follow what's 'right'. It's bloody exciting to be in a completely unknown place, even more kakoi when no one understand your language and u cant even pronounce the road sign. I absolutely love what u r doing. I think as long as u r happy and being able to financially support yrself and yr dependent, that's what i call a colourful life even if it's a bumpy ride! not like we get to be like this when we get older (perhaps =p).

    and I really cant tolerate ppl who only knows how to complain, never take real action =p anyway, enough of my blabbering here =D take care nicole and keep up the good work!

  12. I think everybody goes through that phase in life, no exceptions. Some will take the dive, some will stay in their comfort zone and some goes into deep depression.

    Its easy to say that "you should just do it" and expect someone to just "wing" this and hope to come out of it from the right tunnel. As much as people (and I) want to push themselves to the limit, there is always something to lose. I don't believe in risking everything just so that you feel alive (or let other people have the perception that you are living it up), but if its calculated risk, yes, ONLY if it is what makes you happy. Nothing beats accomplishing something to get the confidence up.

    Unless you have a really wide safety net to fall back on, its really tough for a regular person to just take the plunge. It can only happen to people who are strong willed and determined. For everyone else, its gotta be done in baby steps. Sometimes it good to force yourself into it. i.e. Enter your name into a marathon that is happening in 3 months time before you even know how you are going to train for it. But do it because you want to challenge yourself and will have fun doing it. You are only racing against yourself.

    I am one who struggles to "give up" whatever life i have at the moment, but i am ever so determined to push myself. I'm not going to get myself a list of "100 things to do before i die". Its so artificial and its likely that it will end up being used to show off to others what you have accomplished in life.

    Small steps to get the confidence up. Rinse and repeat. Fingers crossed.

    p.s. Nicole: hope you find Perth a nice place to visit, i was there for 9 years and its the most peaceful place, ever. Gets a bit boring at times since everything moves ever so slowly. Have fun!

  13. like this post. but, just doesn't give an answer in the end. it's a matter of choice, but sometimes, you just wanna play safe. maybe the way we're brought up and yup, society's + friends' influence.

  14. Easy to dive in,but there's risk of drowning.What worst is that you might drag people around you along if not for calculated risks..

    just so hard..

    so hard..

  15. Why sound very much like those words said to Peter Parker by Aunt May?