At the shadow beneath your wings, I'm waiting~~

There he is, in my heart, dancing… Ever so beautifully.

There I am, standing, looking, observing…

Like a display, only meant to be seen, to be admired, to be observed, but never to be hold. He's like a mirage, he's there, but never there; in existence, but what we see is only his shadow, a portrait of his double image.

Unable to grasp his true form, I remain in the corner, observing silently.

I’m like that, timid, shy and a coward. Inability to face my inner self, I hide and hope upon miracle that one day I no longer need to conceal. But you were too far, unresponsive, and hence I’ve withdrawn. And remain so.

So many times, I want to dash forward, take hold of you and fall into your arms. To cup your face and pull you closer so we can feel each other's breath. As I inhale your cologne scent, trace your forehead down to your lips with the tip of my nose, slowly lean my whole body upward against yours with my arms wrap around your neck.

Giggle, when you tickle me. Laugh and have you laugh with me. Smile as you caress my hair, my face, my skin and close my eyes, to reminisce the warmth of your hands, your body close to mine. To show no one, but only ourselves the feelings we share; to look into your eyes and tell you, and the whole world, how much I feel inside.

I move closer, so you wouldn't run away; surf my hands down to your chest, to your waist, behind your back, to feel the contour of your muscles, and let my imagination run wild how it feels like to be grabbed hold on by you, to feel your strength over me, to be controlled, and conquered.

It all happen, right then and there, in my thoughts. And when I come around, I am still standing in the shadow, your shadow, trying to ignore, but observing closely through the corner of my eyes, your movements, your gestures; listening to your every word, every breath.

Yet... sadly... you never seem to move, to budge, to realise me realising you. You continue to dance, in my heart.

And I continue to observe, closely, silently...



But…

Even physical attraction loses its traits when chemistry is amiss.

And I find myself, gradually, unwillingly, reluctantly, but very steadily, walking out, step by step, out of your shadow, away from the shelter of your wings. As I gently kiss your feathers, drew the curtain of light, smile, look back and wave a hushed goodbye. And the oblivious you, continue to dance… away.