So I'm crazy, sue me

Sometimes in order to get something out of your system when one has too much to think and has run out of reason to be saint, one will go to the extreme to be isolated.

No, I am not going to run away to another country, that isn’t necessary.

In this world, it’s easy. Very easy to feel that way. Too easy in fact.

Can you guess? Come on, try to guess it. It’s too easy.



Just switch off your phone and internet line.


No one will be able to get you. No one will even try. Sure… I have friends who know where I stay; sure… they can find me at my house. But will they?

We are so used to having technological communication around with us; we took for granted how communication has evolved to make it too easy for us and underestimated the pervasiveness of these devices in our lives.

To an extend that we would call before we go to a place, call before we meet up, call to make sure if a date is still on. And if the call is not reached, we just assume they’re not there. Longer than a few hours/days, we will try to go online and look for that person, and if he/she is not there. We just wait…. Till they appear. Lame isn’t it? How retarded human have set themselves to be now. Well, at least in this part of the technophile world.

5th February 8pm, I decided to put myself to the test. I switched off my phone, and set my MSN and Yahoo to offline mode.

Following are the records of my schedule onwards,

11pm: Keep wondering if anyone has called? sms?

e360 side
This is my phone

6th February

1:15am: Look at my phone, flip open, almost tempted to switch it on and off just to see if anyone text me. But manage to refrain myself from it
1:22am: Decide to browse the internet, trying not to talk to anyone
1:24am: Shove my mobile phone under the bed, you can’t miss what you can’t see
1:31am: Looking blankly at word document as I type this shit out, thinking how long I can last~

3:25am: Sign off from MSN and Yahoo, so I don’t get messages from people telling me I am blocking them instead of appearing offline

I try not to lie so I signed off. Appearing offline is sort of a lie telling everyone you are not there when actually you are right? Don’t you just hate liars? I dislike liars too. Especially people who ‘put airplane’ (Chinese translation of bailing out, say, from a vacation trip 5 days prior to departure after god knows how many blank promises, that sort of disappointment is enough to send you into depression), yup, that is a form of lie too. Wait, I’m getting out of topic here.

3:50am: Turn on Astro to watch some movies. Did you know they play really cool movies in the night?
5:32am: Got tired of lame old movies, decide to head to bed early today


6:15am: Couldn’t sleep, wake up and walk to kitchen for milk
6:30am: Watch Animal Planet with dad in the living room
6:40am: Make soup with microwave for breakfast
7:05am: Wear my jumper, grab ipod, goes out for a jog in the forest

Melaka Morning
morning view from my house front yard

8:29am: Reach home, realize how beautiful the forest looks early in the morning again
9:00am: Fill bathtub with hot water, take bubble bath

Bring ipod to bathroom and set up incense in the bedroom.

10:50am: 15 minutes of facial, 30 minutes of blow drying & straightening hair (out of the blue) later, it’s time for bed.

5:22pm: Wake up, had a lot of nightmares, wasn’t a pleasant sleep, huge urge to open phone
6:45pm: Take light dinner, sleep again
9:20pm: Wake up, I think I am entering depression

10:08pm: Should be studying, but my eyes are getting blur for looking at the screen too long; waiting blankly, mind empty, more than 24 hours have passed, when should I stop? I didn’t really set a time limit, did I? Now that’s one idiotic thing to do. Should I switch it on now? So to stop my agony? I feel like a walking zombie already… didn’t talk to anyone, maybe only a few words every now and then, but not in actual voice, didn’t even talk to my mom (she would think I’m crazy).

To be continued…


18 kissed Nicole

  1. We are all getting so used to the various technologies today, it's hard to imagine life without. Come to think of it, sad really.
    Looking forward to see how your quest will end.

  2. Haha this is getting interesting . whats the end result gonna be?

    Good to test urself..see eyour limit right.

    Cheers and be happy always

  3. ha! that's very true!

    if our frens who is looking for us... failed to reach our cell, could not see us online in MSN or yahoo, could not get our replies through email...
    they wun bother to look further...

    even if those friends that have our hse phone wun even try to call...

    this is our dependency on technology~

  4. To a certain extend, I do agree with you that humans are extremely dependent on technology but hey, technology is there for that very reason. Of course it renders our life useless when its gone.

    I can still survive without MSN but having no handphone, consider me dead. I am way too dependent on handphone to keep in contact that if you take this facility away from me, I am just as good as dead. :)

  5. well if ur depressed enough and have little friends as i do, its no problem not signing in to msn and not switching off handphone..
    think the longest i survived was like a week? and i only switched it on cos i felt bad if i hadnt replied someone's sms repeatedly for so long. if not i wouldnt have minded going without it for a month! haha

    its totally doable

    for msn it's easy to go without it for a few months cos ppl maybe just assumed ur comp crashed or sth

  6. Hey, I do not have your mobile number...How to SMS u?

    Btw, I did that when I went into depression. Totally blocked all forms of communication. Even my own parents didnt notice that I was home all the while. They thought I was out.

    You remind me of the street artist in the movie "Joe's Apartment" where he laid on the street complete with blood stains and all - waiting for anyone to stumble upon him and see if he was alright. When Joe came across and jerked him, he got up and timed some 2 days 8 hours 32 minutes and 12 seconds (the number of hours it took for someone to notice him and approach him)

    After that, he explained how he wanted to experiment with the coldness of the people in New York by doing such an act, hence the title street artist.

    You seemed to be doing similar with different approaches....

    I'm still not getting your mobile number...Or am I?

  7. huh... so that's why you haven't been online in a while... but i see someone online now... ;)

  8. huh... so that's why you haven't been online in a while... but i see someone online now... ;)

  9. hey.. i've been following ur blog for maybe a month now and i think this is the most interesting post u've put up.. no.. no.. there was that vid of the eye surgery.. TOTALLY FREAKING COOL!!!
    i once left my phone on silent by accident, and went to sleep..
    2 of my friends really suprised me by showing up at my house and getting mom to wake me up.. i was so FREAKING tired, but after what they did, i just threw on my gear and headed out...
    so anyway.. just wanted to say, usually the ones whom you least expect to, WILL suprise you..
    -all the best with the experiment-

  10. people need to have awareness about what is going on in their life lah
    i dont think there is anything wrong with technology.

    I am not a cellphone user by the way and I think it is just sort of luxury than needs.

    I agree with the lame part, that is why one has to be smart enough to organize ones life.

    I heard there is a saying, where modern people are so much into what they usually do,
    until when they suddenly stop what they do, They go blank and dunno what they should do in life.

  11. However,
    I am rather dependant to internet when it comez to online shopping

    I like the experience of getting cools stuffs from eBay and Amazon.

    just a few clicks and they will send nice stuffs to you.

    It is cheaper than normal shops...
    can get a limo for like 100 bucks :P

    when I do not know what to do,
    I shop on amazon and EBay

  12. I'v tried that before actually, I try it for few days..
    I'm freaking depress to keep guessing will anyone call me, find me or what?? that is stupid stuff though, tell myself wont do it again

  13. Got a better suggestion. Try not paying the bills...that will really help yah..

  14. Wahlau eh.....the longest i have survived without a phone is 12hours! And thats becoz i'm on MC.... I'm in construction line, if i disappear too job disappears together with it.! hahaa.....(hey...anybody hiring engineers?...)

    Nico, on a serious note, IF you are having mild depression and sleeping disorder, try this herb called St John's Worts. You can get it from any pharmacy as a food supplement.

    You always come up with stunts like are funny. But, will you be scaring your family and closest frens ar?...they'll be suspecting that you are having schizophrenia leh... hahahaha......

  15. yo sheon, are u a civil engineer? I am also in engineering field :)

    ok thanks for the tips, I will study about the herbs seriously, and maybe i will write about it

  16. LMAO. Isn't Ipod and TV a mean of technology too??

    If u're seriously abstaining urself frm modern gadgets & technologies, should build urself a wooden rack in da jungle, make firewood (no lighter pls), eat phish, wood, leaves, ants, insects. Drink coconuts? Bathe in the sea. Dry off hair by natural winds(no hair-dryer pls). And make friend with da monkeys?


    8 Feb 07, 15:04

  17. Yeah....I'm a civil engineer attached to a highly controversial project in KL...hehehe....but.... project almost finishing liao... looking for a new job.....

    I take St John's Wort to ease my mind and it helps me sleep. I took it a couple of years back to "control" my depression from a traumatising episode. Well..i think it works.

  18. ohhh it seems to b sort of a drug similar to weed/mary jane
    somw people recommend me magick maschroom but I stay out of drugs and use EFT to kill stress. bad people i just voodoo them off :P

    r u still in KL, maybe we can go yum cha