Fasting is my best friend.

I just wrote an entire entry, but decided not to post it in the end.

There are things better left be unsaid and unshared.

May I clarify I have never once mention I am in any way good looking or pretty.

To me, I am me. Just me. A compulsive traveller who can never get enough of travelling. These two weeks, I'm taking a break, not because I have finally taken a toll, but because I need to prepare myself for a travel schedule that is beyond imaginary to come.

I am fat. There I said it, again and again. To people who thinks so, you are right. I never once deny I am fat. So fat I should be put in jail and sentence to death. To people who object, thanks but accept it. This is not America or the UK. This is Asia, where being skinny is a trend. Where being underweight is considered normal, acceptable; and being normal is fat. Where obese people should be killed than be seen walking down the street.

Where being anorexia is better than being called 'fat'.

Sad but true.

I have said that I will dedicate myself to do something exceptionally stupid every month or so. Simply because I am Nicole.

This month stupid thing is simple. I will not harm any fries, nor children of the third world. But instead, to punish myself for being myself, or for being fat, or for being selfish, or for being _____. (fill in the blank)

I will go on a 7 day fast as of today, to redeem myself? To lose 10 pounds? To torture myself? To inflict bowel injury on myself in order to distract self from other negative influence such as depression and stress?

Well, maybe a bit of all of the above. Medidation, a journey through seeking oneself. Whatever..

The only thing that is allowed, is water; and maybe soya or milk during sunset. That's it. At least I won't be overally malnutrition. I think.

If I stop blogging after 7 days, call 999.

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41 kissed Nicole

  1. hey hey....hang on there now nicole... whats with the sudden depressed mood?....... you dun tell me you are serious about the ridiculous dieting idea lar...you'll gonna KILL yourself!

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  2. no, sheon. she's not gonna kill herself. I've been doing this at least 30 days each year. And additional few by my option. If thats true, I should be dead since I was seven. sheon, we're like buddies here y'all, hahaha.

    nicole, i've commented before that i didnt understand why you said you're fat. Now I do. :-)

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  3. take care girl dun over do it ... think of Africa children

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  4. my dear, just come to america. you'll fit right in with the skinnies.

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  5. i need to work out a strategy too for this diet craziness, workin out will help, but if youre going to diet on water make sure to take some vitamins too !! :D

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  6. she is just asking for attention... why do you need to say that you are FAT when you are NOT.. sigh .. you are too materialistic.. wake up dear ... think of other positive things rather than thinking that you are FAT come one ..

    what you want us to do? to praise you that you are thin then only you are satisfied. .. tsk tsk ... be more down to earth

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  7. eh you're not fat... just big boned... HEHEHEHE

    No no i mean u're really not fat lar! dun be ridiculous!

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  8. Setting a very bad example to the young viewers.. starve to diet... Have you seen documentaries, stories about anorexia?

    Where is the word exercise gone?

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  9. if you want to fast, go ahaed and do it, but could you at least do it correctly and in a healthy manner?
    wake up in the morning, just eat fruits or cereal ( of couse with low fat milk), no luch or snack during the day, at 6pm maybe you can take fruits again.. ok dear?

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  10. What is this? A cry for MORE ATTENTION? You have a normal weight. Why would you call yourself fat?

    I hope your younger readers do not follow your diet strategy. When you don't eat and starve yourself, you fool your body by making it thinks that you are starving and then your body will start conserving fat. You will end up slowing down your metabolism and might end up gaining weight instead.

    The best way to diet is the old fashioned food portion control (eat in moderation!) and exercise. Alternating cardio workouts in combination with toning exercises such as lifting small weights, yoga and pilates every other day works the best!

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  11. I love you nicole!

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  12. sometimes when i think of this girl .. i think she is really a BIMBO .. ie beauty with no brain .. she is someone that "talk" without using her brain .. nicole .. you are a pretty girl SO .. buck up .. act like an intelligent girl too .. how come most of the time, when you posted something .. it seems that you are NOT using your brain :( such a pity ... a wasted beauty !!

    anyway .. like the other anoy(s) I would like to tell you that you are NOT fat .. but I personally think that you have to use your brain more.. you are no longer a child but a lady .. so .. act like one!

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  13. I never expect you to think so lowly of fat people...

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  14. hey uh.... just want to tell you that i've been there too, and i understand.

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  15. Totally agree with the last anonymous posting above. Nicole, it's time to grow up (no more childish and senseless acts)

    I think Pink Pau aka Su Ann (check out her blog) is more mature and wiser than Nicole. Even her English is way better than Nicole's. I think she must be 5 years younger than Nicole and yet she does not do nor say ridiculous and brainless things like Nicole does.

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  16. uhh... guys & girls, every bloggers got their own style n way to blog things rite? if everyone is the same then wat is the point? i saw many big names being stucked up in this kind of position.

    i mean u ought to have fans & some seriously annoying peeps tat do not even dare to reveal themselves and posted comment anonymously (sad ur parents gave u name ok)

    so nicole, be urself, find back urself, motivate and hope u got the inspiration to blog the way u did...

    so this 7 days we berkabung k...

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  17. Bourne Identity4/8/07 12:31 PM

    Dun let all the words turn you down, they are just jealous because they can't have what you have. Bad mouth, sour grape is what they can do best. They will try to make you weak, nail your intented stupid act, and try to make you look like a criminal. For these sorry asses, I can only have few words for them "DIRT OFF MY SHOULDER" :)

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  18. Nicole whats ur height/weight? just curious.

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  19. like that called 'FAT' ah??
    die liao, you got to see my size.....

    oh..are u staying somewhere near Bandar Puteri Puchong?
    and on the highrise condo / apartment there too?

    hmmmmm i am moving to Aseana once ready.. :)

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  20. bourne identity ... jealous? nothing to jealous about.. I just want her to face the reality ie SHE IS NOT FAT .. she has nothing for us to be jealous ..

    anyway .. nicole I am sure that you have string fans that visited/commented you everyday .. for what you are .. NOT whether you are thin or fat. So. be happy with what you are ..

    let us see the old nicole .. the one that we saw before all those pageants etc etc .. the nicole that is humble and simple and NOT this nicole that has become so materialistic and self centred. I am wondering whether it is just something that you wrote to increase the traffic of your post .. but the end of the day, it is you, yourself that knows the real reason that you posted this. You cannot blame us before commenting this way because your blog has became a public property hence you have to accept what pp commented about you .. IF you want to be a celebrity blogger (as what they said) so .. be and adult .. and not a child (like someone above said)

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  21. Wah..diet or 'mogok lapar'? No need to be so drastic lah. Eat smaller portions of meals & substitute dinner with blended vege/fruit juices always work 1.

    Less bread and cho...wait...i better don't finish the last word. :D

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  22. u c because of some idiots' comments on 3rd world children and saying the fries idea was stupid she is really pissed off now.n too all those anons who is not satisfied readin her post just STFU and F off nobody ask u to visit her blog nobody pointin a gun at ur stupid dumb anons heads.nicole,jus do wat u want in ur life and write wat u wanna write,we guys with names will always support u.

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  23. That last Anon comment that was posted on 4/8 at 12:39 PM made a really good point. If you are going to blog, then accept the positive comments AND the negative comments.

    On a side note, I am SO GLAD Nicole did not win the Miss Malaysia pageant! I would have felt so ashamed to have her represent our country!
    PS: Seen her "Akon feat Nicole - I wanna fuck you Nicolekiss version, haha" video on YouTube? You'll know what I mean. Of course the male Nicole admirer's population reading this blog would beg to differ.

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  24. oh c'mon.. u're not fat laa..
    on the contrary.. you should have more to eat :P

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  25. Sometimes, its not dat people want to go on a diet or fast. Its just dat sometimes, there's just no time to exercise, having a hectic schedule and all. Plus, after a hard day's work, you'll come home so lethargic and there's just no motivation to exercise. I feel its ok to cut down on food but just don't overdo it. Cheers nicole

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  26. Nicole,U r Not anywhere near fat..=.="I am one of the XL size type..And I know what is fat..I had been 80++kg before..till i went on crash diets and became a bulimic..=X..it ain't fun..Fine, if u insist that u are fat, then I will fast with you too. Lol..cos I am definitely bigger size than u..much more bigger..

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  27. xiao ni: on ah!! we shall fast as of tomorrow. I just had pancake today *guilty*

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  28. fasting isn't the way to lose weight. unless you're trying to dehydrate yourself

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  29. Tsk tsk...Nicole..calm down first..First of all..I am already fasting for 40 days fast and prayer purpose but..I am fasting on junk food and meat only..lol..and I just want to tell you that, you are seriously not overweight, not fat..etc..hmph..fasting is really not the right way to shed kgs..I share with you how I manage to shed 10kgs only in one week++..healthily and gaining my health and maintaining my weight for a long time..I went on detox..it work..really..and its healthy and u dun have to starve urself silly..^^

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  30. Seriously? But I've always thought that you're pretty, and I never once thought that you're fat =.=

    You're just fine the way you are. Being super-skinny is overrated anyway. Enjoy your food, I say!

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  31. pls don't leave us, your blog is my vitamin

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  32. malacca food so nice wor... can make it???

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  33. Nicole, being a girl your age and subjected to the pressure of having to look good, I generally understand how you feel. Truth be told, fasting is not the right way to shed kgs. One way that I've tried and tested working is by reducing the carb intake, this applies to bread, rice, pancakes, etc. I discovered that reducing my intake of rice by half really made a big difference in my weight. The best thing is, it stays low! So try to lose weight in a healthier way, and be a good role-model to those who are reading your blog. :)

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  35. you're sometimes up, sometimes down. but always full of energy.

    some see you as a toy. but you see urself as an instrument that require high precision and skills to handle.

    you're not fat.

    you're a talking yo-yo.

    and i'm Dan, the internet fortune teller.

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  36. Oh yeah, Nicole, I forgot to say that It had been a long time since I had eaten rice or noodles or anything make from flour. I avoid oils and salt and flavouring in my cooking. It is healthy and it had had a big effect on my weight! ^^

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  37. and I do lots of exercises too! Things i enjoy like dancing, make me sweat a lot and I enjoy it!^^Keeps the body ton^^

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  38. Well I don't think you're fat. I don't know who said you were fat and what they expect but IMO, I don't think you're fat.

    Anyway, if you still feel like you want to lose some weight, exercise is IMO a healthier solution compared to dieting. :)

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  39. u r not fat and u shouldn't keep repeating how fat people are seen as sins in Asia. Asians are more tolerable towards them than Westeners, just look at the amount of youths who are ostracized in schools in the western world. They were boycotted and left out simply bcoz they r either obese, plain-looking or different from others. but u seldom c those people being pushed away as much here in Asia, do u?

    i think u r a very intelligent girl but well, humans make mistakes. so i'm not here 2 judge u.

    but i seriously dun think u're gonna go thru wif the fast after da sinful meals u had after tis post!!! hahaha

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  40. blogging no need brain one ma...Use brain to do other thing....Nicole ar i support u one.... u r not fat la....when fat people read what u blog ar, they will get jealous and say bad things about u and many will kill themselves i guess...>_< Don't keep fit la....so many good foods in this world. not worth la....pity ur stomach...

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  41. I think nicole just wants to show the irony of it all.

    Everywhere u look, u'll see those stick thin girls.

    isn't this what ppl want?

    thin is good. =='
    starve, coz u'd look good.

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