Coping in a world without your presence

I will miss you in my free time, so I occupy myself with work, and more work. Diving myself into a world where I am forbidden to miss you is like taking drugs, it only lasts till I sober up. So I sank deeper.

Few days ago I received an amount banked into my account, it was from a small trust fund you had set up for me years ago. Even in death, you were taking care of me. Clutching to my phone, I stared at the numbers in my bank account and bawled.

So many things mean so little to me now. I'll trade everything I have in a whim to have you back in my life, yet not all the wealth in the world could bring you back.

If there is a word to describe what I'm feeling, I haven't found it yet.

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3 kissed Nicole

  1. Saw you at Kaiju today. Wanted to say hi but too shy to pop by. I've been your reader since many years ago! 🤗

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  2. made me weep this one, it did

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  3. You can only take it one day at a time. One step in front of the other and pray one day you will be able to live with the pain. I'm not sure if that day has come for me yet. It's been almost a year for me and breathing is still unbearable sometimes.

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