An Election SMS

Short note: I wish to note that Nicolekiss is politically neutral and does not support any particular political party.


I received this SMS this morning while in my sleep.




It's a SMS about our current election that has been circulating around the mobile world.

This is what it says: "

Dear Msian Indian & Chinese
these are the reasons why we should NEVER vote for BN:
99% of petronas stations owned by Malays
100% pertronas project contractors are Malays
95% Govt Servants in Putrajaya are Malays
95% Govt contracts are given to Malays
100% Govt Universities Vice Chancellors are Malays
100% Students sent to Japan and Korea under the "Look East Policy" are Malays
3 millions Indonesian became Msian citizen with Bumi status
600,000 Chinese & Indian Msians with Red IC are denied citizenship
0% churches/temples are built in housing estates
up to 12% interest rate paid by Govt is for ASN/ASB
96.5% Govt budget for Malay schools (MIC&MCA working for their allies only)

WE WANT EQUALITY

Pls send to 10 ppl

"TIME TO CHANGE" Never think that your one vote can't do much.

" (End)



I don't know how true is this.

But it's very startling and a bit disturbing somehow (at least to me).

Save Crush!

Short Note: The winners of Kenko Contest are Shazz and Chen. Congrats guys for getting fish bites!


Warning: Cuteness overdose at the end

Does this image bother you?




What about this image?




This one?




I don’t know about you, but I definitely don’t want my kids in the next generation to think that turtles look like this.




Therefore I am encouraging everyone out there to save crush!




The Sea Turtle outlived the dinosaurs and is one of the rare few animals to have a life span longer than humans. Like Crush in Finding Nemo, a green turtle can live up to 150 years.

Some of you might think that turtles are ugly sea beasts. But they are in fact such magnificent creatures.


Hawksbill turtle – critically endangered



Green Turtle - endangered


Another amazing turtle to highlight is the leatherback turtle.

It is the largest turtle among all living sea turtles growing up to 6 feet long (longest recorded leatherback was 10 feet long from the tip of it’s beak to the tip of it’s tail and 8 feet wide) and weighing between 200 – 900kg. From such a tiny baby,




They can extend up to… well, you’ll never live long enough to see its full extent.







No wonder it’s known as the world’s fourth largest reptile right behind crocodiles.

But sadly, the critically endangered leatherback turtles may go locally extinct in Rantau Abang, Terengganu. Recently, only a few have returned to nest there. Other species have declined by more than 60% since they were first recorded to nest decades ago.




The horrific part is that in Malaysia, you still can buy turtle eggs to eat and find fisherman using mesh fishnet bigger than 10 inch of size which can cause turtles to get caught and drown.


WWF-Malaysia needs more funds to help protect the nesting places of these beautiful animals as well as to enhance the enforcement of legislation against turtle egg sale and consumption.





Here’s how you can help.

SMS WWF <space> your full name <space> Email and send to 39398. Each SMS donates RM3. Or go to wwf.org.my website to donate.

DO NOT eat endangered species. E.g. turtles eggs, tiger meat, medicines made of rhino horns.

DO NOT litter into the sea, leatherback feeds on jellyfishes and can easily mistake plastic bags for one.

Learn more about our turtles at wwf.org.my.

Save crush, I mean.. the sea turtles, or we will never live to the day to see scenes like this.

Nicolekiss Charity Visit – First 15 Minutes

It was a grand day, five cars front to back drove steadily towards the handicap orphanage fully loaded; as we unload, more cars drove up and more Nicolekiss’ charity visitors dropped in simultaneously.

While I was busy carrying the stuff and greeting the owner of the orphanage.

Our first ‘victim’ has already been chosen.




Met S… (forgot her name), she’s an 8 year old down syndrome girl. The moment Andy walked through the gate, she ran up and grabbed hold of him with a grip so fierce Andy couldn’t move.




So he waited…




And waited…




And gave up...


*omg, so cute*


I assumed this was going to be a loooooooooong day.


*to be continued*

A Drunken, a Playboy and a Retard

I'd rather be single for the rest of my life.

Really I would.

To receive calls at wee hours in the morning to have someone cooed you but totally forget he calls after a night's sleep is like dating someone with an amnesia. Only he chose to be one.

Tall, foreign, handsome, cute and sweet; but also a total liar and serial dater. No, thank you. You can go on to pretend that you are single but let everyone thinks I am all over you while you "lost" your phone on valentine's but out groping someone else. I don't really care, you can go lie to someone else. I'll see you in hell.

And I don't think I can handle someone who is intellectually challenged. No. It is challenging my intelligence and sorry, I don't think I have the ability to commute with my conscience yet. I'm not Einstein and I still need something more responsive than a wall and echoes to sit hand-in-hand on the rocking chairs with.

Single sounds like a luxury about now. Yep.

Throwing Mandarin Oranges during Chap Go Mei @ Taman Jaya

Happy one-day-late Chap Go Mei everyone!

Chap Go Mei literally means the 15th night of Chinese New Year, which is also known as Chinese’s Valentines in South East Asia.


Also known as lantern festival


It’s the day (or night) where young single women gather to throw mandarin oranges (or tangerines) into the sea/rive/lake in hope for their future husbands to pick up.

Nowadays, we write names and phone numbers / url address onto the oranges instead of just names.

I have always been quite negligent of traditional Chinese festivals, but as my friend reminded me it was Chap Go Mei, I decided to head out to Taman Jaya last night after dinner to throw some of my own oranges.


Bought mini ones from local supermarket


At first I thought there were only a few people at the lake, little did I know, there was not only a crowd,




They brought in DJs and boom boxes!


What happened to good old Chap Go Mei?


All the better, cause I have my oranges ready.


Name? Check! Contact no? Check! Nicolekiss.blogspot.com? Check!
(I only wrote my blog address on ONE orange)


I know it’s not safe and very unwise to write your real contact details on an orange where it would be picked up by just anyone, it could be a stalker/pervert/horny stalker.

But hey, it’s Chap Go Mei. It’s only once a year and I’m sure I can afford a little risk every now and then. Why spoilt the festive mood anyway? :D


So I made 5.




On the other side, if oranges are not your thing and you’re not single, you can always buy candle boats and let them drift drown the river (or around the lake) to see how far your love boat can go.




The Thais (and Chinese) believe that the farther the boat floats without the candle light going out, the longer your love with your partner will last.


There was already a scene at the lake with long poles sticking out at every corner of the lake. I wedged my way through and found a group of enthusiastic males fishing for floating oranges with names and contact numbers on it.




When I say enthusiastic, I mean they don’t settle for one or two oranges. These people fish for bags.


“let me see, there should be 35 contacts and counting”


As they say, don’t only opt for one when you can have them all.


“two at one go~!”


There was this bunch of youngsters (young teens?) standing next to me as I observed on ushering a boy to get to know me.

Apparently he thought I was too old for him.




I laughed because those were the exact same thing I would say to a guy in his twenties when I was his age.

I passed him my blog address and promised that I will blog about him.


10 minutes after I threw the oranges in, I got a call from an anonymous.

Guess what?

Someone got my orange!! o.O OMGWTFKNN

I couldn’t believe it but this thing actually works! And he actually got the one with nicolekiss.blogspot.com written on it!

Dear Nicolekiss readers, meet my Chap Go Mei date.




Dong Ling.

A very friendly and sweet Chinese speaking guy. When I asked him how many oranges he managed to gather, he said two but one with a smudged number.

It was a fun night, the music was loud and the DJs made it happening. I will never see Chap Go Mei the same way again. It’s a good way to meet more friends too.

I’ll definitely come back next year.




However, remember to bring your own mandarins. Oranges sold here aren’t cheap.


Note: read the drawn image literally


No, it does not mean 10 for RM2!

NO~~!!!!!

I THINK...... my graphic card has "kaput" (died).

Now my monitor just show a blank screen. How to do anything like that?!! (at my friend's house using his super slow pc now)

Cannot blog, cannot chat, cannot study...

I can't even buy Kenny over again and again as my pet in facebook (Kenny you're getting expensive you know that?). NO!!! And I want to know how much I'm worth now. sniff sniff

I tried to buy Popagandhi but this Darryl Kang kept fighting with me over her. Then after buy, rebuy, re-rebuy; he suddenly turned around and bought my pet - Kennysia! Bloody hell. And then with that, he bought me too!!!!

So now my pet becomes his pet and he's the new master of me and my pet!!! o.O

Someone come buy me~ (my facebook friendsforsale url here)

if you can own me for more than 5 days I'll go out for a drink at starbucks with you.

*slap self*!!!!

No no, facebook is bad for me. Damn you facebook now I'm addicted.

5 days ok? (omg conscience slaps Nicole)

Monthly Income

Short Note: Still compiling photos from the orphanage, have patience okay?


Question:
What has wings, sucks blood, and can’t fly?


Take a wild guess.

No it’s not a broken wing bat.

Guess again.






It’s a….. sanitary pad


Kotex Soft & Smooth Ultrathin Overnight Wings


Hahahaha

I bet you didn’t know that.

Few days ago I was hit by my monthly “visits”,




I hate being a girl sometimes, it sucks. It really does. I want to be a man.

You men out there don’t you dare say you wish to be a girl or say a girl is better.

You have no idea the things we go through. The pain, every month, every year, for the next 40 years since age of 12, god damn it!

Period and women share a conflicting relationship. When it comes, we dreaded it, cause it’s so painful, it’s messy, and worst of all, we have PMS!!! We get grumpy, easily annoyed and extremely sensitive, touch us and we might just cry.

When it doesn’t come, man, then it’s time to panic! Either that means we are getting a baby or we are never going to get a baby.

So anyhow, since my supply of pads are running low, I decided to drop by my nearby local friendly hypermarket to pick up “something” on my way back from “work”.

I walked really slowly so that nothing will ‘drip’. (did I say I hate being a girl sometimes?)

The rack was full of selections.




So colourful.




Running my eyes through the collections of pads, I was in a mili-second dilemma before..


There she blows…


Oh shit!! Gotta make this fast!!


I bet by now many of you guys out there are scratching your head asking: “why the hell do they have soooo many types of pads, it’s just a pad!! Why do you need so many types!! How to choose?! Which to choose!!?” and hoping insanely that no girls will ever ask them to buy these things.

Okay, you insensitive bunch of testosterone-driven males. Nicole, as of I, is going to explain to you WHY we need so many types of pad today! And maybe ONE DAY that you can be a more sensitive boyfriend!

First, I shall start with the day and night use. Why?

Well, during the day, we stand, therefore the flow are usually vertical.




Whereas during the night, we lie down on the bed and sleep, gravity kicks in, and the flow won’t be straight anymore!




And the last thing we want, is blood staining our bed!!

Thus we need all the high-tech features we can get. Take this Kotex Soft & Smooth Ultrathin for example, it has so many features “installed”.


"Superior protection against leaks ans stains - double anti-leakage channels, wings"


Now you know what the wings are for~

That is why, smart intelligent brand SUCH AS Kotex and their intelligent and Sensitive lab researchers come out with 2x faster absorbency! *suck suck suck*


And also ultra thin!! So you can’t see anything! Muahaha


Now you seriously DO NOT think that we girls have flows that run like a pipe for day 1 to day 7 right? (I get this from men all the time, jeez)

Come on… we would run out of blood eventually. The procedure's like this.

First it’s the sign of period. PMS, small signals of blood stains (sometimes) will tell me that the monsoon season is about to arrive.

Then when the first day hits,




There’s no stopping these things, occasionally for more fertile women (such as me :p), the flow seems endless, and the pain can kill! Usually I will stay at home, hide under my blanket, and weep. (Or pop some menstrual pills and sleep)

During this time, it’s either sanitary pads built for overnight or heavy flow usage. Like this one:




For the following few days, the flow subsides and it will remain constant normal flow.




Now it’s time to switch to normal flow pads,




Nearing the end, the flow diminishes and then it’s time for after-flow pad, normal pad applies too.




You ask why not use heavy flow pad all the way? Why keep changing!

Because!!! My dear ignorant phallus attached homo sapiens,

You don’t expect us to wear BIG LONG pads when the flow has subsided to this!




One drop per pad. Are you crazy? You wanna kill mother nature? This is when we need pantiliners. Save cost, save material.


So back to my supermarket story, I pick one up-


Slim, soft and smooth. Sounds good enough..


But then I saw this!


"can't remember my period? are you sure? really?!"


What?! Really?! OMG, I have to get this!

Kotex Soft & Smooth Ultrathin. My prayers have been answered. Now I do not need to resort to cutting out my uterus.


Kotex Soft & Smooth Ultrathin


Don’t underestimate it. Even though it’s so thin, it has the ability to absorb 2x faster! Instant and lasting dryness, coupled with the Softouch cover feature that is oh-so comfy, I won’t get that soggy and damp feeling that makes me uncomfortable all day. Talk about discreet protection. And now I don’t even have to worry about staining my undies anymore with this double anti-leakage channels.

See, told ya this is no simple matter.


Since you all have been so attentive to all my ramblings, I shall end this story with another joke,

Three vampires went to a bar,

the rich vampire ordered a cocktail glass of blood and drank;

the second not-so-rich vampire ordered a glass of diluted blood and drank;




the third, and poorest, vampire just ordered a glass of water, whipped out a sanitary pad from his pocket, and said to the first two bewildered vampires,


“I brought tea-bags”