Shanghai was a nice getaway from everything back home. It provided solitude in a foreign territory, away from everything I knew. The feelings was still raw, but somehow the distance helped, and the absence of constant physical reminders helped. The nights in the spacious hotel room, however emotional, were therapeutic in a certain way. It reminded me of a time I used to travel, just my thoughts and I, disconnected from the life back home.

The modern city provided enough distractions in the day time and occasionally in the night time. I strolled the tourist hot spots that were crowded by local tourists from other parts of China, stood in queue at popular eateries, fought through the wave of crowds in Yu Yuan, and walked the evening streets of central Shanghai city.

On my last night I visited a well reviewed speakeasy bar "Speak Low" and had a great chat with a Japanese bartender while I watched as he prepared cocktail after cocktail. The drinks were expensive, but wonderfully crafted; paired with good company, it was an enjoyable an evening. It's been a while since I've enjoyed anything at all.

I have already dyed my hair dark at Hareta, I thought the vibrant colours didn't reflect what I've been feeling inside, being a brunette suits me better now. Despite the growing length, it was a lot more manageable than being a blonde; my hair hasn't felt healthier in years.

Woke up with a face full of make up and in my day clothes, it’s 12am and I’m in bed in a hotel room in Shanghai. I got up to wash my face and changed into my pyjamas.

You filled my head as I routinely cleansed my eyes and then face. It’s the last day of the year 2017, and tomorrow I will begin a year and a life without you. Everyday I counted the days since you’ve left us, it’s been exactly 50 days.

Shanghai, a city I had not visited in 10 years. Much hasn’t changed and much has, like the rest of China, the city progresses fast, and things have became more expensive since my last visit. I thought about the times you said you wanted to visit Shanghai. I was always the first to deter you, it wasn’t an interesting city you would like, I decided. I wish I’d brought you, and showed you where to have the best “xiao long bao” in the city, you would’ve like that.

Shanghai has been raining since I landed. The cold winter rain made it difficult to walk around the city. I stood by my judgement that it’s not an interesting city for someone who doesn’t like partying, night life, shopping or hunting for the best food. But I had to admit I’m glad to be away. There’s no where in the world where I could run to without thinking of you, that’s a norm, and a given, but I appreciate the little distraction being in a distant city provided.

Dad misses you, he doesn’t say much of it but he gets really lonely, but you already knew that. He still goes to the shop everyday, but he understands it is a lot harder to manage now with your absence. Brother took up the role of taking care of the household rather well despite living in Singapore. He paid for most of the expenses that’s incurred since your passing, took up the responsibility of handling your will and your wishes. But there are late nights, on his visits back, while on my toilet break in between my sleep, I would see him sitting in dad’s rocking chair, red-eyed, in deep thoughts. As you have predicted, I handled your passing the worst. There are still moments where I lost it, my mind, my voice and my sanity. And I have lost count how many times I have cried, most times without intending to. It’s as if my tear glands have a mind of their own.

I became angry, at everyone, at the world, at myself. I shut myself out to a lot of people who cared. In my mind, they didn’t care enough, even though I knew it’s not their fault. It’s only recently I started talking to my best friend, whose wedding I missed because I was still trying to handle your passing. I was angry at her the most for not being there for me when you took your last breath, despite knowing she had a wedding to plan and that it was ‘pantang’ to attend the wake and cremation service. In my mind, all I thought was I would have been there for her in a heart beat if our roles were reversed; I couldn’t be less emphatic during those times. My irrationality was driven wild by my emotions. The pain was raw and real. Guess I have a lot of growing up to do.

It’s late. I should be getting back to bed.

Mom, I miss you.
Till we speak again. 

How do the rich and famous spend their money on their travels?

Indoor heated pool on your 40th floor suite? Automated self-lifting self-heating self-flushing toilet seats in your hotel room? Grand Piano next to the your walk-in wardrobe on the presidential suite?



Let's look at some of the hotels in Macau.

1. Hard Rock Hotel: Presidential Suite

Jacky Cheung stayed in this suite during his performance here; and the room was designed with his comfort and taste in mind. Other than the walk-in wardrobe, panaromic view in the master bedroom, and jacuzzi tub in the larger than life toilet, perhaps the most stunning element in the suite was the all-white grand piano, with its own city view; followed closely behind were the racing game chairs next to the living room.






















side note: worthy to watch at the Hard Rock Hotel was this massive dome shape theatre where they showcase life-like show (we watched one that talked about dragons and the pearl) that made you felt like you're inside a fantasy world; almost 4D-like. It's worth paying the entry fee which was MOP50 per ticket if you're not a guest at the hotel.




this scene was especially heart-stopping: giant octopus enveloping the dome


2. Galaxy Macau



There are three hotels inside this development: Hotel Okura, Galaxy Hotel and Banyan Tree.

Frankly, Banyan Tree wins hands down on having the classiest and most expensive rooms. All their units come as suites and the most basic unit is equipped with stunning view of the garden and an indoor heated pool overlooking said stunning view.The hotel also comes with its own boutique spa centre.

Hotel Okura is specially designed to cater to Japanese, though most of their guests were mostly Chinese, Japanese who do visit Macau would find this hotel very pleasant with stay in. Features like automated self-lifting heated toilet seat would be one of them. The hotel also comes with a Japanese restaurant on a high floor with Japanese chefs and Japanese waitresses in kimonos.

Third hotel is the Galaxy Hotel, which has access to the wave pool (that looked like an artificial beach) and has rooms that cater to the lower range income group; lower, but not completely affordable.

Despite the high density of rooms available in this property, all the hotels are, at all times, 90% occupied. Which says a lot about the booming tourism industry in Macau. Rich and famous from mainland China would flock here to spend their wealth in the glitz and glamour.








wave pool


butterfly garden




Banyan Tree Suite: Indoor heated pool


Banyan Tree Suite


Banyan Tree Suite


Banyan Tree Suite




Banyan Tree Spa


Banyan Tree Spa


Hotel Okura display


Sake tasting at the lounge of Hotel Okura

The day started as the sun set over the sea of clouds as we slowly descended into Macau International Airport. It was a good omen to the start of a promising trip, and perhaps one of the most beautiful sunset I've seen, at 30,000 feet in the sky.


trusty backpack and travel pillow

It was night time when we landed in Macau. We checked into Sofitel hotel after dinner which was located in the old town. We would soon discover the location supremely prime for tourists who wish to explore the real Macau, the old Macau before all its glitz and glamour of billion dollar hotels, casinos and its entertainment facilities.







I have not visited the city in 7 years, and strangely it had never occurred to me to revisit this place in this time frame. Knowing my last visit here consisted of escorts of 10 agent-like bodyguards and was ushered around the city as one of the finalists of a beauty pageant. Considering we spent most of our days in casinos and 'eating' expensive food we couldn't eat (it's a competition. hello? waistline?), it's hard to associate Macao with fun.

Which was why I never expected my trip to Macau this time to be so pleasant. No doubt they have endless amount of classy and premium hotels, but what caught my heart was the old town of Macau at night. It was like walking in Paris on a summer night: narrow lanes, small shops, orange street lights, the sense of safety that never existed in Kuala Lumpur day or night, drizzles that didn't bother anyone; it was incredibly romantic.




Sao Paulo Cathedral Macau




JQ and Veron who were perpetually hiding behind me in every photo








local stall serving beef organs (牛杂)




JQ and her tongue



We ended the night at a local eatery place serving double-boiled milk (炖奶), located next to Senado Square. I can't imagine what else it's called, it's nice though, it's a dessert that has the same texture of yoghurt without the sourness that can be served hot or cold. Sweet ending to our first night in Macau.

I'm sorta a Starbucks fan. Every city to every country I go, if there's a Starbucks, I would want to pay a visit.

Beijing was no exception.

To my delight, I did find a really nice double chocolate chip muffin which it's not available in Malaysia.
Yumz.







This area was probably the favorite part of moden Beijing for me. Lots of shopping, youngsters and occasional families.


San Li Tun (or Salitun, 三里屯)










Impressive Apple flagship store (selling Apple products more expensive than Malaysia).

When I visited Beijing years ago, The Forbidden City was the top list of my to-visit places. It was the place I've seen countless of times in movies, Chinese drama, historical documentaries and spent my entire second senior year reading about the magnificence of it (I did a year in China history).


Meridian Gate


Gate of Supreme Hamorny

To get into the main palace was no small feat, much like my experience walking through Angkor Wat, it was a long road in, but with the majestic-ness of the forbidden city, you would have to walk through three grand gates (much like the two photos above) to get to the main Hall of Supreme Harmony (where most of the initial imperial scenes in films were shot).


Hall of Supreme Harmony

I know, I'm such a geek.

I grew up a pretty genius student actually. I was good in maths but not so good in memorizing stuff; but I have always loved my history, despite being on the brink of failing all the time. You see, in my high school, the way they mark your history papers wasn't based on your knowledge of history but by how much you can memorize, word by word (in the thousands), right out of the text books. It's ridiculous when I think of it. I was never good in memorizing stuff, I was good in handling logical solutions and understanding concepts. Basically I was really good in subjects like calculus, algebra, chemistry, physics; heck I was second in my class at one point (would have been better if my Malay language and history subject didn't suck so bad); and even represented my school in a national math competition against those university students.


But I do remember having a great history teacher, with a penchant of bright red lipsticks, who would tell tales throughout the dynasties of China in absolute detail, up to every gruesome bit in imperial tortures, war tragedies and internal palace conflicts. What a charmer.

Anyway, here are photos taken during my visit to this wonderful UNESCO site.

All the knobs on this gate door was rubbed off color by visiting tourists, Asians no doubt. Seriously, what's with the rubbing. Almost every significant tourist destination I visited from mosque in Istanbul to statues in London has been rubbed till the paint peels by Asian tourists; so long it's within reach, they'll rub it hard till the cows come home. Apparently by doing so brings good luck. Oh sure... -.-


I did realize the guards in the Forbidden City were of equal weight, size and height. It must be a China thing to be OCD-ish symmetrical in everything. I mean, sure, it's visually pleasant.


Rather impressed by this cheap looking but brilliant audio guide device in the Forbidden City. For every area you have visited, the audio guide will auto detect and plays the recording based on your area so you don't have to press on any button. And the red lights will disappear for the places you have already visited. Such convenience. I can even bet you a hand that many Chinese tourists here will bring this device home as souvenir instead of returning them back for their deposits.

As you can see, the Forbidden City was so huge that I didn't manage to finish it even after spending an entire day there. In fact, I had to sprint-walk through the right hand side of the map because it was about to close soon.


Hall of Supreme Harmony, where the emperors of the last two dynasties hosted grand ceremonies like coronations and weddings.




Believe or not, this was their fire rescue system back in the days. In winter, hot coal was placed underneath the giant pots to prevent the water from freezing.




My favorite place in the palace has to be the imperial garden, a playground for the empress and the favored concubines. I have heard wondrous description of the beauty of this place, in books, historical documents, novels, movies, etc. I didn't imagine it to be so small, though I could imagine this to be an absolute paradise back in those days. What with pagodas and ponds, age old trees perfectly grown into such demeanor shapes and artificial life-like miniature mountains topped with a pagoda for moonlight watching.












Qin An Dian (Hall of Imperial Palace)










This was the corridor connected to 'hou gong', the bedrooms of all of countless concubines that has been recruited into the palace. Sadly, it's not as pleasant as you might think.


Then there's the garden for the emperor himself. What a diva.








I call this, the Entertainment arena. Of course it's not the real name, but you can guess its purpose.




Empress and emporer can view performances from this room. Life of a royalty's always good.


This mountain of jade was enormous. You could see my reflection on the glass and gauge just how big this jade was.


Beautiful carvings on a giant jade




A very significant area in the 'hou gong' was the Zhenfei well. Rumored to be where the famous and most favored consort Zhen (by Emperor Guangxu) to have fallen and died. Read more about the story of consort Zhen here, you can also see her photo in the link.


Though how could anyone fit into this well was a mystery to me. I knew people back in the days were smaller in size, but this well couldn't even fit the width of my shoulder in.


A reconstruction of the well.


A last view of the empty Hall of Supreme Harmony as I make my move towards the exit/entrance of the Forbidden City - a rare sight.